Monday, 5 October 2009

11 things I have learned from living in a flat like a grown up

Housework has the ability to expand to fill all available free time. No matter how long is spent on it, the flat always looks "slightly in need of a clean".

Changing bedclothes on a double bed takes less time than you think it will. Washing up takes far, far more.

Other people do tiny bits of easy washing up in secret so that it's always your turn when there's a huge pile to clean.

Washing up is the punishment for enjoying a delicious meal, and can therefore be made more depressing if you're washing up old stuff from a night when you weren't even there. And the person who was cooking somehow made something using three roasting tins and an egg whisk.

Doing a set of washing is a chore, but doing all the washing in the flat and hanging it up to dry on every available hook, rail and prong in the flat is awesome and makes you feel like you're living in a 19th century industrial laundry.

Leaving the fridge open overnight is a terribly frustrating thing to do. Leaving it open twice in a week is something that can cause serious rifts in the household.

It is possible to intend to eat the same thing every day for a month and fail because you forgot to take it out of the freezer, leading to emergency trips to the local supermarket/takeaway for a suitable replacement every day.

You can buy food magazines, find delicious ideas, cut out recipes and stick them to the fridge all you like, but when push comes to shove, it always seems to be bolognese or baked potato for dinner.

The sooner all the house-cleaning robots arrive the better. After a days work, I'd take a chance of being-overthrown-by-our-creations in order to relax rather than do any cleaning.

While you're cleaning something, everything else in the flat gets a little bit dirtier just to spite you.

Fantasies about winning the lottery and owning a mansion become fantasies about hiring a maid.

super-polished blogathon score: 5

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